Strength of My Heart
by Phayte
Summary: lemon for my story Musings of a Star-Crossed Mind


Musings of a Star-Crossed Mind  
  
**Disclaimer** don't own slayers or anything associated w/it, if I did, I wouldn't very well be writing fanfiction, but EPISODES of it ne?**  
  
~Strength of My Heart~  
  
It's been a week, and I can walk with my arms about your shoulder. It's feels as though a great burden has been lifted from our shoulders, tension is almost non-existent. I can see in your eyes that you feel the same, now, they hide nothing from me. I can see that you think of no one else unless you are missing the past. A part of that gaze in your eyes is only for me, it feel so right, so free. There's a clarity within my soul greater than the escence of the surroundings [and a fireball] could have ever brought. You're off on one of your magic lectures, giving me time to think, I suppose I should be paying attention, but, none of this attains to me, other than the fact that it does you.  
  
"You're not paying attention are you?"  
  
"Nope, I guess not."  
  
That look that you reserved just for me returns, just as it has many times since you've tried to tell me about the basics of magic. "You jellyfish brained, thick headed...HEY! Put me down!"  
  
I laugh, it's cute watching you struggle when I pick you up, "You must be exausted with all that talking, it's my duty to make sure you're comfortable."  
  
"Oh, don't give me that duty crap! I'm not comfortable...what'er you..ah!"  
  
You're hitting my back and kicking your feet now, it hurts a little but it's fun, you're so cute. "I'll be the noble gentleman and carry you to the next town."  
  
"No you don't! I'm not gonna be seen slung over your shoulder like a sack of flour! Put me down!" I can hear the laugh in your voice, you know this is just a game. *** There's only one way to solve this..."AAAAAAAHHHHHHHH"  
  
I break into laughter when you drop me [I land expertly on my feet, that's just me *wink*] and you go reeling backwards. The old screech in the ear, always works.  
  
"Victory!" *** I finally gain back my senses, that hurt! Closing one eye and rubbing my ear I look up at you, standing there winking at me with that victory sign held up. "You're a brat, ya know that." I wink as I get up, dusting myself off.  
  
"It's what I'm good at." You laugh and suddenly, things are right in the world again. *** It's raining...I hate rain, it's wet. It makes me wet, I don't like being wet, being wet is uncomfortable. And then, there's the thunder, and lightning. Don't ask me why, but I'm deftly afraid of it. Stupid phobias, stupid stupid stupid!  
  
I'm in my own room at the inn we've found, it feels nice to be inside, out of the rain, but it's still wet in the air. Stupid wet!  
  
*CRASH*  
  
"EEEE!" Wide-eyed, I run down the hall, like a little girl, to your room and throw open the door. Baka, you're asleep, how could you sleep in something like this? Wish I were as thick-headed as you sometimes, ignorance is bliss. *** Without so much as a second thought, Lina threw herself on Gourry's bed and huddled up next to him, trembling. Gourry instantly awoke, ready start complaining, but instead, looked down to see her shaking against him. He smiled and held her, instantly knowing what was wrong, "It's ok Lina, the storm's outside."  
  
"Yeah, I know. Can't believe I'm so weak." There was a deffinite tremble in her voice.  
  
"No, not weak, everyone's afraid of something." Lightly, Gourry ran his hand up and down her back.  
  
She looked up, "What'er you afraid of?"  
  
Laughing nervously, he wanted to say nothing, but knew he would be caught in a lie, and as far as he knew, he'd never lied, on purpose anyway. But the truth seemed, well, bizarre, "You," he rubbed the back of his neck nervously with his free hand.  
  
"Baka!" She laughed and pushed him lightly.  
  
The mood seemed to lighten as a flash of lightning and crash of thunder went by without Lina flinching. Gourry shifted however, something growing inside him. Perhaps it was just his overtiredness, but, it seemed like so much more. Having her at such a close proximity, he needed something from her. 'I've never felt like this before...what's goin on?' "Lina?"  
  
"Hm?" Her response was somewhat drowsy, and very comfortable. She was on her side, her head buried in his chest with her hands around his waist. She was very reluctant to move, it was warm, she liked warmth. Against all her better judgment though, she looked up at him.  
  
His breath caught in his throat, her eyes sparkled with a kitten-like curiosity. Her face illuminated by some unknown light, probably inside her. She seemed to absolutely glow. 'When did she ever look like this?' He'd shuttered at the thought that this had been her all along and only he had just not noticed.  
  
The storm had, for the most part, passed, it was dark in the room, but as Gourry gazed down at the young woman snuggling into him for warmth, he realized that somehow, somewhere along the road they'd traveled years together, she'd changed, grew. Her pale skin glew with a radiancee like a pearl reflected in the sun's light. Her fiery crimson eyes burned with a passion that could only come with maturity, and yet, none of the old fire that had been her when they first met had been put out. She looked, in all her right, like a being of a pure ethereal ecsencee. *** Oh L-sama no! He's just, just staring at me. I knew sooner or later he'd notice, but, it took him so long. Still, I could have waited for an eternity for this. He probably thinks I'd done this on purpose, but.... *** Lina tore her gaze from him, too ashamed to look into his eyes.  
  
Gourry was confused, to see such a hurt cross her eyes when they just held that of eternal bliss. Something else caught his eyes as he saw Lina moved to cross her arms around her chest, trying to hide something. Utter terror crossed his face, 'I knew she was sensitive, but, it was all a joke. What have I done?' Moments of awkward silence followed between the two as old rumbles of thunder echoed through the surrounding hills of the town, each lost in their own thoughts.  
  
'Cummon Lina, you know he'd...well, he might say something stupid, but...he doesn't mean it. Right? Why'er you so scared? This isn't Lina Inverse, sorceress supreme! Let's just off and out with the truth!'  
  
'Stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid! You are the idiot she says you are! Why, for once couldn't you think? Now she's all sensitive, well, we're just gonna have to show her that things aren't what they used to be!'  
  
Lina squimed suddenly, ready to explain what had happened between her and the Sea of Choas, but was unable to utter a word as her mouth was engulfed by Gourry's in a passionate kiss. She began to blush brightly when she felt his hands roaming over her body.  
  
Somewhere, birds swam in the sea, fish flew freely through the air, wildcats played rousing games of poker with antelope, and stars twinkled brightly from there home on the ground. Lina's world was turned rapidly upside down as she lay here with him, breathing in his scent, his very escence as he kissed her all over. Things seemed so different, yet right somehow, never in her life would she ever admit to wanting this, but in fact, she was a woman, she needed someone to love her, not necessarily dominate her, just love her. And that is what he did for her.  
  
She gasped sharply as he began to fondle her breasts beneath the pajamas complimentarily supplied her by the inn. Suddenly, Gourry stopped, all sense returning to him, wind crashed against the window, rattling shutters while he stuttered, "Oh, L-sama, Lina, I'm so sorry, I just, lost control, never meant-" He was immediately silenced as he watched her crawl out of bed and slink out of her clothes and underwear, standing before him naked and completely vulnerable, nevertheless, she smiled sincerely. ** You're just staring, I should just put my clothes back on. By L-sama, what if you hate the way I look, my body went through such a change after that whole ordeal in the Sea of Choas, what if you hate it? How could the Child of Chaos be so scared of you? But I am terrified, a freak, that's why you're staring.  
  
But, but...you did start this, made me finally feel like I'm ready for this. Oh L-sama I want this, you, now. *** You're just standing there, by the Lord of Nightmares you're beautiful though, but why are you just standing there like that? Aren't you cold? Maybe I should give you a sheet or something, someone might walk in, and if he sees you like this I'd...Wait, how could I think such awful things of another person, could you mean so much to me that I wish death upon someone just for gazing upon something that is only mine? I'm learning so much... * "Lina?" Gourry was just about to move to cover her with a blanket from the bed when she flew into his arms, embracing him, kissing him, craving all that was him.  
  
All trepidation was soon forgotten as each layer of Gourry's clothing was shed and the pair locked in only an embrace shared by lovers. Thunder crashed outside as her hands entangled in his hair and his roamed her body, finding each spot she desired to be touched most. Each sigh, sharp gasp, and moan encouraged him on, to keep exploring, creating an mental map of every inch of her body.  
  
Soon enough, she found herself craving the same satisfaction of hearing his encouragments, her hands trailed down his chest to his thighs and everywhere in between, pausing to carress his throbbing manhood. He sucked in breath, attempting to take in her gentle, ghost-like touches and her nibbling of his neck.  
  
His hair fell, soaked with sweat, over her, covering her face like a tent so only they could see eachother's faces. She smiled and paused in her exploration to wrap her arms around his neck and kissed him pationately. He took the chance to position himself over her opening and plunged himself into her. Something snapped and it seemed like the whole world stopped as she winced slightly, his eyes went wide and he looked down at her.  
  
"L-Lina, but-"  
  
Opening one eye, she placed a finger over his lips, "I wanted to give you this, I can't exactly explain it but would you have continued if you knew?"  
  
He smiled and shook his head, "Probably not."  
  
"Well, now we don't have to worry about it." Kissing him again, she began to rock back and forth, feeling him expand within her again. Eventually the pain subsided as it gave way to love and desire once again.  
  
In and out he plunged, harder, faster, keeping pace with her quickening gyrations. Breathing and heartbeat accelerated beyond recognition. Lifting his head, he tried to hold back, just for a bit longer, but darkness formed behind his eyes, stars lit up around him. Lightning flashed in the night as it hit it's climax along with them. She could feel holding back, waiting for her. They both sped up, beyond what was humanly possible, she pulled him close to her as she let go, the precise time he let part of himself into her.  
  
He fell next to her, panting, regaining his consciousness. She closed her eyes, panting just as fast, and lay on the bed, reveling in the new-found warmth within her. I was wonderful to feel him inside her even after he had taken himself out. 'One of the greatest gifts I'll ever have.'  
  
Slowly he pulled her into his arms and ran his hands through her sweat- saturated hair; still to him, it felt silky and soft. He smiled, she snuggled into him and fell asleep smiling, feeling more complete than she ever had in her entire life.  
  
A low rumble of thunder echoed through nearby hills as the storm passed. * Long after she had fallen asleep, Gourry held Lina, caressing her face and hair. Suddenly, an image of his grandfather, Rawdy Gabriev, appeared in his head, it spoke rather seriously to him.  
  
"You know that you have just bound yourself to her forever? That now you must do more than merely protect her?"  
  
Gourry's smiled broadened, "I know, and I'd have it no other way." Wrapping his arms around her waist, he lay his head over hers and fell asleep, dreaming of their new life, as lovers. *********************************************************************** a/n: oh I SO hope ;you all liked this!!! I tried to make it sound romantic, was it, it was my first lemon and i like the way it turned out. reviews are very much welcome!!! 


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